The Beatles’ discarded song that became an anthem after John Lennon’s murder: “I was a very jealous, possessive guy”

In February 1968, the Beatles flew out to India in search of inner peace, but returned with a sack of songs. Rishikesh was a spiritual retreat, but also a wild songwriting workshop. Under the watchful eye of Maharishi Mahesh Yogi, they wrote more than 30 songs that would end up on the White Album, the most chaotic, most personal, most ‘Beatle’ album they ever recorded.

While there, Paul McCartney wrote Mother Nature’s Son. John Lennon, inspired by the same conversation about nature, composed Child of Nature - a slow, wistful ballad with the opening line: “Along the road to Rishikesh, I was dreaming more or less”.

But while Paul’s song made it onto the album, John’s was left out. The Beatles already had too much material, even for a double album, so in a quality control cull, Child of Nature was shelved along with another Lennon composition, What’s the New Mary Jane.

Lennon’s personal life was in disarray. While he had traveled to Delhi with his wife Cynthia, within just a few months they would be divorced. John had met someone else, Yoko Ono and he wasn’t a self-confessed “Jealous Guy” by any stretch at this stage of the game.

The first acoustic demo of “Child of Nature” was recorded at George Harrison’s house in Esher in May 1968. Lennon sang about mountains, deserts, and spiritual freedom. The lyrics were different, but the melody was already there.

Back in the UK, during the “Let It Be” sessions , he tried again. Renamed “On the Road to Marrakesh” the Beatles recorded it during the group’s first rehearsal at Twickeham Film Studios on January 2, 1969.

But it didn’t work. In fact it was even worse than the demo. Too sluggish, too introspective. The Beatles binned it again.

Crippled inside

Three years later, John returned to the melody. By then he was no longer the young man who dreamed of India. After undergoing therapy with Arthur Janov, Lennon had the stark realization of who he really was - a broken, deeply insecure, jealous man.

He returned to the song he penned in India, changing the lyrics completely. “Jealous Guy” was born as a confession. An apology and a plea to the women he had hurt throughout his life.

“I didn’t mean to hurt you / I’m sorry that I made you cry / I’m just a jealous guy.” There were no metaphors. Just a man facing his demons.

In a 1980 interview with Playboy, Lennon put it bluntly: “The lyrics explain themselves clearly: I was a very jealous, possessive guy. Toward everything. A very insecure male. A guy who wants to put his woman in a little box, lock her up, and just bring her out when he feels like playing with her. She’s not allowed to communicate with the outside world – outside of me – because it makes me feel insecure."

In another interview with Rolling Stone, he added: “When you’re in love, you want to possess the other person completely. Even though you know it’s absurd, you can’t help it.”

Yoko Ono also spoke on the subject. She said John’s jealousy wasn’t sexual, but spiritual. “It bothered him that I had another language in my head, Japanese, which he couldn’t share.” Lennon even asked her to accompany him to the bathroom, for fear that she would associate with other men in the studio.

The song was recorded between June and July 1971, with production by Lennon, Yoko Ono, and Phil Spector. The arrangement is simple, almost fragile: piano, flute, soft strings. All in the service of emotion. Lifelong friend Klaus Voormann played bass. Jim Keltner was on drums. Alan White was on vibraphone. John Barham was on harmonium. “It wasn’t a precious piece, it was an honest piece,” Keltner said in the documentary Above Us Only Sky.

Lennon didn’t release it as a single, but the song began to breathe on its own. In November of that same year, Susan Shirley recorded the first version. Donny Hathaway performed it live in 1972. Claudine Longet mixed it with “Don’t Let Me Down”. Rod Stewart sang it in 1973, in a raw and heartbreaking version. Monica Törnell translated it into Swedish in 1975. Frankie Miller made it soulful in 1977. Lennon’s wound was already universal.

Roxy’s “Jealous Guy”

After Lennon’s senseless murder in December 1980, “Jealous Guy” became an anthem. Roxy Music released a tribute version that reached number one in the UK and Australia. Since then, more than 90 artists have covered the song: Lou Reed, Deftones, Peter Criss, Youssou N’Dour, Elliott Smith... Each with their own style. Each with their own wound.

The song touched the heart not because of its production or its melody, but because of its truth. Lennon didn’t hide. He didn’t blame anyone. He showed himself to be vulnerable, remorseful, human. In an era when rock was filled with egos and posturing, “Jealous Guy” was a slap of sincerity.

Paul McCartney said years later in an interview with Playgirl that Lennon confessed to him that the song was about him. “He told me he wrote it out of jealousy toward me. I think it was a kind of envy.” But John never confirmed it in public. In all his statements, he insisted he was talking about himself. About his insecurities. About his relationship with Yoko.

“Jealous Guy” also tells the story of the transformation of a discarded Beatles song into a solo Lennon masterpiece.

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